...today, i'll be going to my former school to receive a prize for whuttadilly malay thingy. it's not that i dont give much a damn... it's just that, having that title didnt even make much difference in my life. yeah, i've been looking forward for that thing since i was in secondary one. imagine me, shaking hands, receiving a prize in my NPCC uniform. *phew* that sounded gorgeous... i kept having this competitive spirit to at least see my name in the board claiming, " NURUL AIN BINTE SAMAD, TOP IN LEVEL FOR MALAY". challenge myself against syamilah, rafizah and syamilah and rafizah. *urgh* ... but now. having to live as a drifting soul. leading a life so stagnant. stranded nowhere. i dont think i care much about that. i dont think i care at all.
...
having to wait and wait and wait, is very tiring. trust me on that. i havent even started on my next leg of my life. i'm just there. life suddenly seemed so surreal. how i wished... i'm in my art and design class now. i dont care having to sit in front of a canvas for five whole periods, cause now i think i found the drive for me to produce a better subject for my art and design o level project. probably i even get an A2 at least. *fat hope* maybe, we just have to suffer before we realise the reason why GOD created us to live in this world. now that i've been so... so... so... left out, i realised that i'm here for a reason... but nah... i've not found the reason yet. guess i have to suffer more then.
